Dr. Frankl; what we take from the world adds meaning to our life

Today I will tackle the second way that Dr. Frankl recommends to bring meaning to our lives. He writes: “the second is what he takes from the world in terms of encounters and experiences.”

At first consideration, this seems quite selfish. I need to come to terms with the idea of accepting, or taking from the world in order to give something back to the world. Is this what Dr. Frankl means? Do I have to somehow manipulate or invest that which I have received, in order to give back? Or is it sufficient to add meaning to my life simply by receiving a gift? Can I simply take pleasure in the newly-budding flowers in our garden without trying to do something with those flowers? Can I simply enjoy a stunning performance of my favorite Mahler symphony without trying to create something out of the experience? Can I simply accept a friendly gesture from a neighbor without feeling obligated to make a return gesture later on?

In all these cases, it is difficult for me to stop with my receiving of the gift. When I see the new flowers, my natural inclination is to go outside and water them so they have what they need to thrive. When I listen to Mahler’s 1st symphony, I want to share it with my family, friends, and students in the hope that they will grow to appreciate it, as well. I don’t do this naturally and am often at a loss as to HOW to respond. Do I call them together for a listening session? Do I write a paragraph and assignment for my classes to study and experience the piece? Or do I write a short article or blog post about the piece? Perhaps the answer is “None of the above.” It is just as beneficial and meaningful to accept the gift of music as it is to give the gift of music to the world.

Friendly gestures like calling another person for coffee or lunch, stopping by with cookies, or simply calling to talk are most pleasant to receive. There are friends who seem to be the hosts, and those who seem to be the guests. Long ago, I was friends with someone whom I really enjoyed. We spent hours together and shared many interests. He and I were similar in that neither one of us naturally contacted others to get together. So, as time went by and our lives took different turns, neither one of us tends to call the other, or play the role of host. When we do see each other, we are delighted and always say that we must get together again soon. Yet, neither he nor I seem to be in the frame of mind to make that happen. Do we have to make a point of getting together regularly, or can my life be more meaningful simply from having known him and knowing that we could get together anytime?

To extend this idea a little further, my wife comes to mind. She is a polar opposite to me in the realm of friendships and socializing; she is a gifted and natural host. She makes a point to contact her friends on a regular basis to schedule lunch or coffee, or some other type of activity. She loves reconnecting with her friends and is committed to doing so. When she contacts someone after many weeks have gone by, she is adding meaning to her life and theirs: she gives a gift of herself and her time to the friend and she herself derives meaning by receiving the joy that she feels during the time they spend together. I am so fortunate to be married to my wife. She knows that I don’t always feel like going places, especially if I’ve had a long day and am fatigued. However, she makes a point to suggest we go run a few short errands, or maybe stop for a drink somewhere. She orchestrates our tickets to see Broadway shows, our trips both short and long, our family activities and special time with our grandson. I believe she loves doing this and does it naturally. She is a natural gift giver in this realm. She adds much meaning to her own life by making these things happen. But she also adds meaning to my life and the lives of all our friends and family by creating opportunities for us all to receive joy and blessings simply by being together and experiencing things with each other. The giving from one person and the receiving from another add layers of meaning to all the lives involved. Meaning seems to beget more meaning.

There are a few more ideas to consider before we move on to Frankl’s third way to imbue meaning into one’s life. These are simply some additional words to consider; namely, value and matter. Tomorrow I plan to consider the idea of adding value and the question of what matters and why. These are integral to our initial exploration of Dr. Frankl’s recommendations for adding meaning to our lives. Until then!

839 words
25/5 and 20
Day 6; August 5, 2023
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